Okie Sister

Okie Oracle (2)

I again traveled to the mountaintop home of the Okie Oracle, deep within the Wichita Mountains, to hand deliver your inquiries. I found the Okie Oracle in good spirits and ready to depart more ancient wisdom. (Read the first Okie Oracle here.)
The Okie Oracle is pleased with your offerings of praise and your quest for further knowledge. “It’s a tough job being the lone logical voice on the mountain, but somebody has to do it,”  Okie Oracle.
After several minutes of watching a hawk makin’ lazy circles in the sky, and a quick snack of nuts and berries, I begin to transcribe the Oracle’s sage words.

Dear Okie Oracle,
All my life, every Spring and Fall, millions of citizens move their clocks forward and backwards for Daylight Saving Time. I ask you, why? Does DST accomplish anything? Just because we’ve done this for years, is that any reason to continue the practice? I’m sure when this idea was dreamt up, people didn’t own a bazillion items that have a clock or digital display. It seems to me like an antiquated idea whose “time” has come and gone. What will it take to put an end to DST?
Help,
I’m Going Cuckoo

Dear I’m Going Cuckoo,
It’s shameful that the outdated Daylight Saving Time still exists. It’s ridiculous that the “1% energy savings” is still cited when that study was performed in 1976! The current average computer or TV probably uses more electricity than an entire household did 33 years ago.
Sadly, our best hope, a wall-to-wall mass media education attempt that took place in 1990 failed. Too many people didn’t understand the importance of replacing Daylight Saving Time with “Hammertime” because they mistook the campaign for a rap video. Benjamin Franklin – 1; MC Hammer – 0.
Hammertime actually pre-dates Franklin (an obvious plagiarizer) by several centuries.

 

Signed,

Okie Oracle

 

Email your questions for the Okie Oracle to okieoracle@gmail.com.

"For The World Is Hollow, And I Have Touched The Sky"ST:TOS

Okie Oracle (1)

In an effort to enlighten, as well as entertain, Okie Sister has traveled to a high mountain top in a remote area of the Wichita Mountain Wildlife Refuge to consult with the elusive Okie Oracle. Perched high above the lakes and wildlife, the Okie Oracle basks in the serenity and quiet of the unspoiled nature below. The perfect spot to contemplate the chaos and confusion of the everyday world.
Folklore has it that on moonlit nights the Okie Oracle transforms into the great black bison and stand in the middle of Highway 49, daring vehicles to pass without flinching.
The Okie Oracle is knowledgeable in all earthly and otherworld matters and is willing to depart some of this ancient wisdom and advice on us, the lowly masses. If you have an inquiry for the Okie Oracle, email okieoracle@gmail.com and I will again ascend the mountain to obtain answers for you, my readers.

 

Dear Okie Oracle,
Since you are able to explain things in a simplified way that even I can understand, maybe you can help me out here. I've been so busy enjoying my high definition television programs recorded on my DVR, brought to me through The Dish Network, that I've not been keeping up with the major switch about to occur from analog to digital programming. I keep hearing about it, and converter boxes, and government vouchers. What does it all mean? Why is the government involved in TV viewing? Are my tax dollars being used to help people afford what I consider to be a luxury, not a necessity in life?
Sincerely,
Satellite Viewer

Dear Satellite Viewer,
The switch from analog to digital TV only exists to justify having a “crawl”, announcing the transition, annoy me while I’m watching King of the Hill and The Simpsons. I can prove that is the reason because why else would they have the crawl on the high definition channels? These video feeds can only be seen on digital-compliant equipment and they are completely separate from the digital and analog feeds. Exactly how many households have both high-def TVs on satellite or cable *and* analog TVs with “rabbit ears” needing a converter?
The government is involved because, while you consider your money to be YOUR money, they’re pretty sure that your money is THEIR money. They are killing two birds with one stone; if they ignore the Bill of Rights and illegally take your property (cash) BUT give it to someone else (converter box) somehow it all balances out so you can’t really call them sleazy thieves.
Clever, huh?
Okie Oracle

 

"For The World Is Hollow, And I Have Touched The Sky" ST:TOS